This looks like fucking oatmeal. Absolutely appalling.
rat91
You failed miserably
-hacks4pancakes-
no, stop that right now, to maccas for you
OccamsBanana
Hayaaaaa
ZakX11
Did you dump 3 cumloads into it as well wtf am I looking at 10/10
Groundzer0es
Did you put the eggs in the pan with the rice? Next time try frying up the eggs separately so it doesn’t hydrate the rice too much making it harder to fry properly.
West_Wedding_161
the rice need to dry overnight to make good fried rice
Square-Way-9751
Congrats! You made porridge!
Exact_Touch_4794
looks ok I would still eat it
Pale-Adeptness6478
The key is use cold rice. I usually make it with frozen rice and microwave it until it’s just flaky.
Fackrid
Alright I’ll be the helpful one here…fried rice is hard to just do without some.kimd of guidance…it’ll almost always wind up too wet. I always do my eggs first, cook them fully and set aside, then any vegetables and meats, and THEN I’ll do my aromatics which are then joined by the rice, and after a couple of minutes everything else is added back. Also, the best tip I ever got was to use salt and white pepper (and optionally MSG) for seasoning, and only a small amount of actual sauce, mostly for color. Stick with the day old rice though, unless you have a rice cooker and can easily make drier rice fresh
somethingrandom261
Yea those eggs aren’t done
External_Quality5613
Dude you forgot to fry the thing enough
sighduck42
r/uncleRoger will love this
Irradiated-penguin
Uncle Roger ancestors crying rn, haiyaaa
Sorry-Fly-5262
it’s the egg that doesn’t look cooked? I only see a few pieces because it should have formed after enough heat.
Irrane
??? I fear the rice you cooked with is about to go bad or straight up bad already. This is what my cooking looks like when I try to fry old rice about to go bad hoping that’ll make it more edible. If it doesn’t dry out and it looks like this, I don’t eat it anymore. Too far gone.
None of your other ingredients should have made it this wet. Hope I’m wrong and/or you don’t get sick.
TsarKeith12
Oh… uh, you’ll do better next time 😭
More heat, i think. It’s hard w butter, better off using an oil, make sure it’s HOT
cheesesoes
I see nothing wrong here tbh
ChuteBoxeKick
Jamie Oliver approved
TheeArgonaut
Dude uncle Roger gonna get ya
Toilet_Reading_
It looks gross, but does it taste good?
Anarchy_Rulz
Did you try making fried rice or try making rice fried? Cause how the hell you try the former and end up with the results of the latter 😂
LalunaKnox
I’ll call 911
Bitbatgaming
Making fried rice look like oatmeal is an impressive stupid food accomplishment. Congratulations.
machiavelli33
Well … … how’d it taste?
SimpsationalMoneyBag
EducationalTangelo6
Based on your ingredient list:
Cook the egg first, then set it aside.
Fry the rice in a 1/2 teaspoon of butter (TEASPOONS are your friend) until it’s fried.
Add eggs.
Add teaspoon & a half of soy sauce.
Stir, cook until egg is warm and soy sauce is well-incorporated.
Serve.
Leave the soy sauce bottle on the table so people can add more to their desired taste. (May I recommend *not* adding 1 & 1/2 tablespoons, we are not trying to reach sodium poisoning.)
It’s really not that bad for a first try. You just need practice. Then you can start adding other things (bacon, chicken, veg, basically you can go nuts AFTER you master a basic fried rice.)
sassy_sapodilla
As a Chinese person, I feel offended.
Kaylculus
uncle roger died due to this
Economy-Future6622
Bro I’m literally going to throw up. Put a nsfw tag or something LMAO
Economy-Future6622
My dog could probably make rice better than you ngl😭🙏
Dangerous-Lab6106
Nothing in that recipe should make the rice look like that. Did you use Instant Rice and use too much water?
SombraMonkey
I’d say… needs more rice or less sauce.
MisterP56
That’s a very sad excuse for fried rice. Sorry.
MandolinMagi
You’re doing the right thing with the old rice. But your result is atrocious.
Few suggestions:
Cook the egg separately, less mess.
You’ll want some vegetables/aromatics, some onion and garlic would go a long way. If nothing else some powder would work.
If you don’t have a wok, use a stainless steel pan.
Get the pan really hot, toss some vegetable oil in. Cook your vegetable real quick, toss your garlic/ginger/aromatics in, stir that for like 30 seconds, toss the rice in
Keep it moving, and after about a minute scrape a space clear, pour the soy sauce in the open spot, and then incorporate.
The whole process once your eggs are ready should only take 5 minutes or so. ***HOT*** and fast is the name of the game here.
Keep trying, maybe use a different rice, and don’t be afraid to throw away failures- if it looks terrible, why would you eat it?
lamest-liz
I personally wouldn’t use butter I think that’s where it got too wet. Use some sort of cooking oil and not a ton
cassfromthepass
Maybe you can save it maybe if you cook it a little more reduce it down I don’t know why it looks so soggy
frostysauce
Your eggs are wet.
Arabana-Lang
Your mom was right. Rice was too wet, also I don’t think your eggs set enough before you put the rice in. -1/10 wouldn’t eat 🙁
Polentaeater
Had you washed the rice before boiling it? For me that makes a night and day difference, even washing it poorly vs properly. So if you hadn’t at all I can see why you got rice pudding instead of fried rice
Massive_Spot6238
I don’t say this often so I’m sorry for the harsh language.
Eww
-OmegaPrime-
Gotta cook and drain the rice and ket it set uncovered in the d Fridge for a day or at least overnight to get all the moisture off of the rice.
43 Comments
This looks like fucking oatmeal. Absolutely appalling.
You failed miserably
no, stop that right now, to maccas for you
Hayaaaaa
Did you dump 3 cumloads into it as well wtf am I looking at 10/10
Did you put the eggs in the pan with the rice? Next time try frying up the eggs separately so it doesn’t hydrate the rice too much making it harder to fry properly.
the rice need to dry overnight to make good fried rice
Congrats! You made porridge!
looks ok I would still eat it
The key is use cold rice. I usually make it with frozen rice and microwave it until it’s just flaky.
Alright I’ll be the helpful one here…fried rice is hard to just do without some.kimd of guidance…it’ll almost always wind up too wet. I always do my eggs first, cook them fully and set aside, then any vegetables and meats, and THEN I’ll do my aromatics which are then joined by the rice, and after a couple of minutes everything else is added back. Also, the best tip I ever got was to use salt and white pepper (and optionally MSG) for seasoning, and only a small amount of actual sauce, mostly for color. Stick with the day old rice though, unless you have a rice cooker and can easily make drier rice fresh
Yea those eggs aren’t done
Dude you forgot to fry the thing enough
r/uncleRoger will love this
Uncle Roger ancestors crying rn, haiyaaa
it’s the egg that doesn’t look cooked? I only see a few pieces because it should have formed after enough heat.
??? I fear the rice you cooked with is about to go bad or straight up bad already. This is what my cooking looks like when I try to fry old rice about to go bad hoping that’ll make it more edible. If it doesn’t dry out and it looks like this, I don’t eat it anymore. Too far gone.
None of your other ingredients should have made it this wet. Hope I’m wrong and/or you don’t get sick.
Oh… uh, you’ll do better next time 😭
More heat, i think. It’s hard w butter, better off using an oil, make sure it’s HOT
I see nothing wrong here tbh
Jamie Oliver approved
Dude uncle Roger gonna get ya
It looks gross, but does it taste good?
Did you try making fried rice or try making rice fried? Cause how the hell you try the former and end up with the results of the latter 😂
I’ll call 911
Making fried rice look like oatmeal is an impressive stupid food accomplishment. Congratulations.
Well … … how’d it taste?
Based on your ingredient list:
Cook the egg first, then set it aside.
Fry the rice in a 1/2 teaspoon of butter (TEASPOONS are your friend) until it’s fried.
Add eggs.
Add teaspoon & a half of soy sauce.
Stir, cook until egg is warm and soy sauce is well-incorporated.
Serve.
Leave the soy sauce bottle on the table so people can add more to their desired taste. (May I recommend *not* adding 1 & 1/2 tablespoons, we are not trying to reach sodium poisoning.)
It’s really not that bad for a first try. You just need practice. Then you can start adding other things (bacon, chicken, veg, basically you can go nuts AFTER you master a basic fried rice.)
As a Chinese person, I feel offended.
uncle roger died due to this
Bro I’m literally going to throw up. Put a nsfw tag or something LMAO
My dog could probably make rice better than you ngl😭🙏
Nothing in that recipe should make the rice look like that. Did you use Instant Rice and use too much water?
I’d say… needs more rice or less sauce.
That’s a very sad excuse for fried rice. Sorry.
You’re doing the right thing with the old rice. But your result is atrocious.
Few suggestions:
Cook the egg separately, less mess.
You’ll want some vegetables/aromatics, some onion and garlic would go a long way. If nothing else some powder would work.
If you don’t have a wok, use a stainless steel pan.
Get the pan really hot, toss some vegetable oil in. Cook your vegetable real quick, toss your garlic/ginger/aromatics in, stir that for like 30 seconds, toss the rice in
Keep it moving, and after about a minute scrape a space clear, pour the soy sauce in the open spot, and then incorporate.
The whole process once your eggs are ready should only take 5 minutes or so. ***HOT*** and fast is the name of the game here.
Keep trying, maybe use a different rice, and don’t be afraid to throw away failures- if it looks terrible, why would you eat it?
I personally wouldn’t use butter I think that’s where it got too wet. Use some sort of cooking oil and not a ton
Maybe you can save it maybe if you cook it a little more reduce it down I don’t know why it looks so soggy
Your eggs are wet.
Your mom was right. Rice was too wet, also I don’t think your eggs set enough before you put the rice in. -1/10 wouldn’t eat 🙁
Had you washed the rice before boiling it? For me that makes a night and day difference, even washing it poorly vs properly. So if you hadn’t at all I can see why you got rice pudding instead of fried rice
I don’t say this often so I’m sorry for the harsh language.
Eww
Gotta cook and drain the rice and ket it set uncovered in the d
Fridge for a day or at least overnight to get all the moisture off of the rice.